Monday, July 19, 2010

Scratch on the Record!

What up peeps! No songs today. In reading emails/talking to some of our readers, I realized I need to take time out and clarify some things. So I'm removing my earbuds for a sec. and just clearing up questions, etc. today. Hopefully this will be a short and sweet one so I can get back to the rockin and rollin of a situation.

The good doctor:
I see my June post about helping him through a rough time confused yall! LOL. Let's be clear...he and I are PLATONIC friends. My desire to help him through a close death is the same desire I would have for a female friend who was going through the same. My angst about it being the 1st time in "that place" with him is the same I'd have with a female friend with whom I'd never experienced her method of dealing with pain and loss. Didn't come from a romantic place at all. LOL. But so many of ya kept saying " what's up cuz I thought your interest was fizzling around May but then your June post you trying to be there for the cat". Of course I am. I don't just leave ya to fend for yourself. LOL. He hasn't hurt me. We just don't work romantically. I can dig it and still support you as a friend. As long as you aint overstep, I can separate the two and rock with ya if ya need me.

Per my May post, the interest, on my part, was fading. That was May 18th. Two glasses of wine and a night out with my girls a few days later...interest dead by May 21st. LMAO. He's still hot to look at though. Hhahahaha. But I have no romantic notion or feeling for the brother. Really want him to find someone though. Good guy. Just not my sho.

Work Life:
Some of you have asked about my new work direction, why I'm gone for weeks at a time, etc. First, thanks for checking on me. I've been studying for my certification program. Test is VERY SOON and I'm not ready for it. Scared to death I'm going to fail it! Arrrggghhh! Keep the prayers that I do well going for me please and thank you! It's important that I pass it.

Also on deck, joined the Peace Corps. I have a 18 months before I ship out. Why, Shai?? Whhyy in the midst of the certification courses, the regular 9-5 and just home life did you add something that big to your plate??? yeah, I dunno. LOL. I've wanted to serve since I was 16. One day I said, ball to the mutha-fuckin walls, let's getter done. Still wondering how much of T-Gyrl's wine I had that damn day! But either way, I'm in it river deep and mountain high. Have to pass the medical check first. Ha! We'll see how that goes before I give myself permission to panic.

So, now that I've cleared up/caught yall up about those two things, on to the dating scene. In the midst of it all (and believe me, life lately has been CRAZY) I have a date this weekend! Yeah...not sure how I feel about that. Not even sure how to approach it. Its been a LONG time since a man has officially asked me out in a "Would you allow me to take you to dinner" way. I didn't even think they made those dudes anymore. Sounds odd. I know. However, most of my adult dating experiences were in hindsight! LOL. i.e. We were such tough friends and went to dinner so often that, by the time we owned up to mutual interest, I'd look back and realize "oh...these were dates??" LOL. More of the, we're chillin at the crib and (as always) I'm hungry so he says "let's go grab some food", scenario. I tend to realize a bit too late that it was that brother's "plan" to keep me well fed, liquored up and camped out at his crib for a few weeks. To those brothers, that's a date.

But this dude is different. He believes in formality. Even when I did say let's hang out (honestly, on some "I'm bored" vibe) he researched places to hang out based on what he observed as my likes and dislikes. word?? I didn't even know he was paying attention.

But this dude is different. He calls just to hear how my day went. Honestly, even if he only has 5 minutes in his day, he wants to spend it hearing how mine went.

But this dude is different. He tells me constantly how beautiful or sexy I am. Makes clear statements about his thoughts and intentions.

But this dude is different. He doesn't mind when I'm in a mood and itching for a fight. In fact, I think it turns him on. LOL.

But this dude is different. He doesn't want me to just chill at his crib. He is big on taking me out.

But this dude is different. When I do just want to chill at the crib, cuz I'm having a bad day, he invites me to his house on the lake. He'll tell me where the spare key is and to come over when I'm ready. He won't be there invading my space. He's at work. He'll leave a tray of strawberries (or summer fruit) and a glass of wine for me on the back patio. I sit with my iPod & my glass and just zone out looking at the water. He then calls HIS OWN DAMN HOUSE to tell me he's on his way home so I can wrap up my zen session and he asks if I need him to bring me anything.

But this dude is different. When I want him there with me, he'll sit and read with me on the porch. Like me, he doesn't need crowds and attention. He's candid and full of laughter. But when I tell his blunt ass he needs to back down and just hold me a bit, he doesn't mind showing the sensitive side of himself.

He's a friend and that may be all it ever is because he's too familiar.
We have too many of the same connections.
But...this dude is different....
and I don't just mean because... he's white.

*slipping on my earbuds. ready to rock with this thing *
Que the music...



  1. @ Anonymous - don't know if I can fam! I need more color in my scenery. LOL

  2. @ T-Gyrl - yeah..something tells me we shall chat about it soon. LOL. I'm not going to date him though. Can't let that thing get too far. Avoiding it like OJ on the Turnpike.